A little frazzled but still smiling


A little frazzled but still smiling
Originally uploaded by jcgr

Sometimes life tosses us around a bit, but we still come up smiling.

This poor “stress ball” shows the effects of his own stressful experience…having been tossed around by a dog…but has bounced back, still smiling.

What score would you get on a listening test?

This is a test.

It is only a test.

And the good thing is, it’s simple.

But it’s also a test of a very important skill.

Do these two things:

1. First, count the number of times this week that you’ve felt very “listened to.”

- Who was listening to you?

- What you were talking about?

- What were the circumstances in which they were listening to you?

- What, specifically, made you feel so “listened to”?

2. Now, count the number of times in the past week that someone has said to you, “Thanks for listening! That really helped.”

- Who were you listening to?

- What were they talking about?

- What were the circumstances in which you were listening to them?

- What, specifically, do you think made them feel so “listened to”?

What was the total for each part of this simple test?

If your score is zero on either part, there’s probably work to do (although it may have been an unusual week).

If it’s good listeners you need, find a few people with whom you can talk things through, and talk to, as needed.

And if it’s listening you need to learn to do, begin practicing.

No matter what work you do, listening well IS a skill you need.

The tale the pedometer tells


The tale of the pedometer
Originally uploaded by jcgr

A little data can tell many things.

In this case, I started the pedometer on my phone on a busy walking day.

When I checked the results later, it surprised and amused me:

1. It was amazing how quickly the miles added up.

2. The path showed that at one point, I was, literally, going in circles over the course of an hour or so. That’s when three members of my family tried to find each other on a large campus, and a very large crowd of people.

What simple data can you track that will tell you a few helpful and, perhaps, amusing things?

Take the present

“Go!”

“Hurry up!”

“It might be too late!”

Is that the type of constant pressure you living with, living in and living under?

Sometimes stop.

Just stop.

And be.

Right where you are.

I had a moment like that this morning.

A challenging deadline met, I paused for a cup of fresh coffee, and the gift to self of stretch-out time to read the morning paper in meandering fashion.

Full of the moment, full of the pause, I stopped to notice it all.

And I noticed how perfect that moment was – just that moment. It was full.

Take the present.

Sometimes, just pause.

Let the present be enough, let the present be all.

Freshly blooming beauty


Bright white
Originally uploaded by jcgr

Roses are just starting to bloom in our part of the country.

This often-bountiful bush is just starting to bloom not far away from our home.

Flowers are probably popping up in your world, too.

Where are the places near you that you can count on for freshly blooming beauty now…or soon?

Give those smiling muscles a good workout

Want an exercise that will help you feel better right away?

Smile 50 times a day, every day.

Even if you don’t let anyone see you smile, smile anyway.

Without fail, 50 times a day.

Better yet?

Share your 50 smiles.

Give them away.

50 smiles.

Every day.

Think I’m kidding?

Just try it.

50 smiles a day.

It’s light-giving exercise that elevates you, and is a gift for the people you face.

Give those smiling muscles a workout, at least 50 times a day.

What are you waiting for?

Start now.

Smile 1, smile 2, smile 3…

Soon you’ll feel what I mean.

Just a moment’s pause…to window shop


Momentary window shopping
Originally uploaded by jcgr

I was amused at this quick moment on a trip last fall to New York City.

A couple of policewomen couldn’t help but to glance for a moment at shoes on their rounds of the city.

After all, beautiful shoes are beautiful shoes, no matter who you are, or what job you walk.

It was a flying through life Monday here…how was yours?

It was a rare Monday in my world.

I felt like I was flying through the day, in the good way.

And I was almost afraid to look too closely at how quickly the “to-do” list was turning rapidly into the “it’s done!” list.

You know how it goes. There’s that quiet little fear that if you look too closely, good luck, under close inspection, will fly away.

Yes, it was one of those kinds of days.

Not until about 3:10 pm did I hit the first pothole in the day’s progress and plans.

And then that pothole was a bit of a doozy, but I got back on track again.

At some point before Monday ends, I’ll take a moment or two to try to figure out if there’s something specific I did to make (or let?) this day work out as well as it did.

Maybe it was that moment or two last night when I couldn’t get to sleep. I purposely shifted from worrying about a few things to thinking about things that make me smile.

Yes, that may have been it.

All I know is that I’m going to do my best to make it a flying-through-life-in-the-good-way Tuesday next.

Here’s to a great Tuesday in your world, too!

Rainy day view


Rainy day view from SFMOMA
Originally uploaded by jcgr

We react and adapt when we must.

And when faced with a gray day, a bright, cheerful umbrella can go a long way to chase the blue and gray away.

What’s your best defense against an otherwise dreary day?

Need to laugh? Recall now-funny mistakes you recovered well from

Are there times when, overwhelmed by the weight of world news, you need a moment of lightness or levity?

If so, and if you can laugh at yourself, just think of some of the biggest embarrassments or mistakes you recovered well from.

As long as no one was hurt, mistakes and foibles that may have been horrifying when they occurred can be quite funny at some distant date.

Do you need some inspiration to get started?

If so, here are three stories from my “Embarrassments I Survived” Tour:

WOOPS ONE

I was in the first month of my first job after college one bright June day.

Nervous about the first weeklong training I was there to do for a class full of elementary teachers, after the warm up and greeting, I reached up to pull down a projection screen.

Suddenly, it crashed to the floor.

Somehow, I had pulled it off the wall.

The class and I were both stunned. Speaking for myself, I was:

a) amazed that it was even possible for me to pull a projection screen off a wall,

b) wondering what to do next about that screen suddenly on the floor, and

c) embarrassed to have done this in front of a room full of people I’d be teaching for the rest of the week.

I collected myself, then joked, “It seems I have much greater strength than I knew!”

They laughed. We relaxed.

Then we adapted, projecting the slides on the wall for the remainder of that day.

WOOPS TWO

I once spent, oh, an hour or so with mascara running down my face in rivulets on the sidelines of a high-attendance Big 8 conference college football game.

It was during a time early in my career when I was a freelance sports photographer on the weekends. This was a high precipitation day with the temperature teetering right on the edge of freezing, snowflakes turning to rain almost as soon as they fell.

At some point in the second half, I climbed the many steps of the stadium to the restroom, facing hundreds of fans as I climbed, step by step. Many of them were, strangely, staring at me.

Once in the restroom, out of habit, I took a cursory glance at myself in the mirror, expecting to verify that nothing was out of place.

This time, though, I suddenly saw a Halloween mask-like face staring back at me. Black streaks were running from the bottom of my eyes down past my chin.

It was a bit like the famous Edvard Munch painting, “The Scream.”

Horrified, I finally understood why so many people had been looking at me strangely as I climbed the many, many stadium steps.

All I could do at that point was to – once again in life – laugh at myself.

I paused for a moment to collect myself, cleaned up my face, and headed back to the sidelines.

WOOPS THREE

An error appeared in the title of the lead article of a scientific journal for which I was the brand new assistant editor.

That’s not the worst of it.

The erroneous word was “menstrual.”

And that embarrassing error went ALL around the world because this was the top scientific journal in its field.

I discovered the error in the first few minutes of the first morning back to work after my honeymoon.

And while the error ultimately escaped correction, it had not escaped detection in the rounds of printer’s proofs. I’d caught it before the magazine was printed, and called it to the printer’s attention. But he had apparently not taken me all that seriously.

We both learned.

The correct word, by the way, was “menstrua.”

And while that word, from my perspective, was an unfortunate and risky word choice on the part of the authors, it was scientifically correct in the way it was being used in the title.

“Menstrual” was not.

So back to work on that first day home from the honeymoon, I took one look at the fresh issue of the scientific journal for which I was responsible for successful production and distribution and was, naturally, horrified.

What did I do next?

Well, thankfully, my new manager was on vacation and didn’t catch the embarrassing error before I did.

I started by calling the authors of the article to apologize and assure them we would print a correction.

Then I called the scientific editor of the journal, a world-renowned expert in the field who was a professor at the University of Wisconsin.

He laughed in the midst of the dilemma because he, too, had thought “menstrua” was a risky word choice, and he could see I was doing my best to clean up the mess I had not caused.

And then I called printer.

I let him know that I’d meant what I’d said when I’d said, “Here are the corrections. MAKE SURE you catch this one…the erroneous “L” on the lead title.”

It was ultimately probably a blessing in disguise, for while my predecessor in that job had apparently been fairly casual about the journal, the printer realized quickly that on my watch, we would be working to high standards. And we would expect to, and would work hard to get it right.

He realized that, like Horton in “Horton Hatches the Egg,” I meant what I said, and I said what I meant, and we would get along fine as long as he understood that.

Oh, and by the way, I took friendly hassling from the scientific editor in Madison, WI for the rest of the time that we worked together.

He thought the whole circumstance was ultimately VERY funny because he could see that I took my new job seriously and would do what I could to protect the results of his hard work as the editor of this world-renowned journal.

Well, there are more embarrassments and mistakes I’ve made that I could share, but I’ll leave it at that.

The point, of course, is that the humility and, ultimately, the humor that these experiences bring every time I recall them is always a good and refreshing thing.

What about you?

What are your “Embarrassments I Survived” stories?

And what did they ultimately help you learn or do?

Whatever they are, always remember that last part…you survived them!