Like many people in the Bay Area, we're far from our own families, and don't travel back home for Thanksgiving.
And so, like many Bay Area transplants, we celebrate with friends.
In our case, it's the 20th Thanksgiving celebrating with two families with whom we share the Great Annual Feast.
This year it's different, as one member of the group who had battled cancer for years is now gone. He passed away in late September.
Because Thanksgiving is different in the way that we dreaded ever since he got his diagnosis right before Thanksgiving nine years ago, we're trying to start new traditions that are future-oriented.
What we've done this year to adapt has been memorable. We realize we're created new traditions:
- Joining 11,000 others this morning at the Silicon Valley Turkey Trot in San Jose which benefits charities helping families meet their need for "health, hope and a home."
- The four teenagers in the group are working together right now to make pies for dinner (we have at least seven different desserts for ten people. We'll diet tomorrow).
Next year our Thanksgiving will be different again.
Three of the kids in the group will have been away to college for the first time, and will be full of stories (some that they probably share and some that they don't). And who knows what other changes will have occurred by then, too?
And so, because life continues to move on, but some traditions stay the same, I was curious about what others had to say about their favorite Thanksgiving over the years, and their favorite parts of the holiday.
I turned to members of a professional group I'm in, Women in Consulting, for their thoughts.
Their stories follow. Some are quite funny, some are very touching.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, all!
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Compiled responses to the question, "What was your most memorable Thanksgiving?
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When I was 6, and my brothers were 4 and 6 mos old, we ALL had the flu - dad too. But we insisted on having Thanksgiving dinner as usual. My mother, bless her heart, did the full presentation (turkey, stuffing, all those sides, home made pie, et al) and set her usual beautiful table.
I remember taking 2 bites, and I don't know if anyone else ate anything. But we were happy, if sneezy.
My mother did not complain, seemed to be happy to maintain the family tradition...but she does refer back to that year frequently with some irony.
It's family legend.
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My most memorable was one at my great Aunt Vera's house.There were 7 or 8 of us around the table with Aunt Vera at the head of the table and my dad and I on the opposite end.
We had a miniature schnauzer, Dooley, and my aunt had a cat. My father loved teasing the dog about "kitties" and getting Dooley all riled up.
My aunt was very hard of hearing at the time, a very slow eater, and always the last to finish eating.
The dog had been sleeping peacefully under the table throughout the meal but then the cat wandered into the room.
The rest of us were waiting for Aunt Vera to finish eating and my dad started getting the dog riled up to "get the kitty." Of course Aunt Vera couldn't hear this and she was still concentrating on the great meal.
I knew what was about to happen under the table, having experienced my father's antics before with the dog and "kitty," so I curled my legs onto my chair and all of sudden after the proper amount of teasing from Dad, Dooley and the cat were going around under that table!
The rest of us were cracking up because of: 1. the noise under the table and 2. the fact that Aunt Vera just went on eating and had no idea what was going on.
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Celebrating Thanksgiving with a large group of my husband's colleague's girlfriend.
She held a large, casual gathering at her home for her grown kids, and many of her college roommates.
I loved the fact that these women in their 50s had shared a lifetime of memories together - through marriages, deaths, divorces, children, moves.
They were so warm and welcoming to us newcomers and so FUN. The food was great too! :)
(BTW my husband's colleague broke up with that girlfriend several years ago and so of course we were no longer invited to the party, but I still miss them.)
_______Most memorable: last year at Atlantis although not in a good way. Atlantis was great but it was an odd Thanksgiving. I like being home.
Best: Up at Tahoe with my mother-in-law and immediate family.
Very small. Snowed!
We just did a simple meal, the foods we all love.
_______My most memorable Thanksgiving?
Remember the classic movie A Christmas Story, by the humorist Jean Shepherd, in which the family ends up having Christmas dinner at a Chinese restaurant? That's because a neighbor's dog ran into their kitchen, swiped the turkey off the counter and started munching on it.
Well, a few years ago, I found myself alone on Thanksgiving, and thought I'd just find a restaurant in which to enjoy dinner solo.
Easier said than done! About the only place open in Marin on Thanksgiving was a Thai restaurant, so that's where I dined, on beef satay.
_______The most memorable one is a toss up between two "first" Thanksgivings.
The first one was the first one in our new house ('97), where I was hosting dinner for the first time for both my family and my husband's family.
I was cooking two meats and doing all this stuff and stressing because my sister-in-law is a gourmet cook.
I decided that was silly, and decided to treat it like any other meal--if it doesn't turn out, we can always order for pizza. No matter how fancy the meal or who it's for, that's my motto.
The other was my first Thanksgiving as a mom.
My daughter was only 18 days old, and only home from the hospital for about 9 days (she spent about 10 days in the NICU).
When you're a new mom, the first everything is always special, and I was so very grateful for the beautiful creature that came into my life and that she was healthy and safe.
_______Many years ago when my brother and I were in our 20s and both living in Menlo Park, it happened that both of our parents were going to be out of the country at Thanksgiving.
We rejoiced, because Thanksgiving with either parent is a huge production, driving to LA or Monterey, days spent cooking, decorating, polishing the silver (my parents are from the generation who actually got silver for their wedding presents, and use it for formal occasions), hand-washing the 'good' china, and much fretting over timetables, oven temperatures, availability of fresh sage, and any hint that things could fall short of full Martha Stewart perfection.
I planned to spend my 'free' Thanksgiving day blissfully reading, and my bother enthusiastically mapped out a plan of attack for the Chevy engine he was rebuilding.
The night before Thanksgiving, I got a phone call from my brother: "So, what are you doing for Thanksgiving dinner?" I told him I wasn't doing anything, aside from maybe reheating some lentil soup-- that was the whole point this year, nobody had to do *anything* about dinner!"Erm, well, my friend Cameron just told me he can't go see his family in New York, and he seems really bummed about it, so I thought maybe..."
Matters rapidly escalated from there.
No sooner had I allowed the possibility of maybe, just maybe, cooking something for Thanksgiving dinner for him and Cameron in my tiny studio apartment, then my brother managed to remember three other friends all of whom would have a dreary, hungry Thanksgiving if they weren't invited. Ever thoughtful, that lad!
We ended up having spaghetti and meatballs, with cheap Chianti and a Grand Marnier chocolate torte (I'm not much of a cook, but a killer baker).
I had no dining table, but Cameron cheerfully took the door off the coat closet and balanced it on a couple of cardboard boxes. Problem solved! We drank our Chianti from an assortment of coffee cups, and 5 guys managed to wolf down an entire 10" chocolate torte rich enough to clog your arteries by just looking at it.
After dinner we watched 'Young Frankenstein' on the VCR, chanting along with the lines, sipping coffee laced with what remained of the Grand Marnier.All in all, the most fun I've ever had at a Thanksgiving dinner.
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Flying to Mexico Thanksgiving morning and having dinner that evening at the Café de Olla in Puerto Vallarta with my hubby.
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In the early 90s, when I was in my Junior year of college, my mother was diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer.
The prognosis was not good.
She opted for really heavy duty chemo (so heavy that it completely knocked out her entire immune system), followed by a bone marrow transplant. We literally sold the family farm to pay for her treatment.
The day a patient gets the bone marrow transplant is considered their "second" birthday. It's a very risky procedure, and you know that your loved one is literally hanging in the balance; all you can do is pray they don't reject the bone marrow, because that would be the end.
My mother's transplant was successful. It was Thanksgiving Day that she received the bone marrow transplant, and >15 years later she is still cancer free.
So Thanksgiving will always be a day where I am flooded with gratitude for the gift of more time with my beloved mother. She rocks.
_______My most memorable Thanksgiving was when my nephews moved past their grunt-level teenage years and joined us in the kitchen.
I taught my 21 year old nephew to make bread from scratch and my Mom taught my 23 year old nephew to make pecan pie, crust and all.
Sweet!
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