Fresh Eyes

Traffic lanes...on the sidewalk

Traffic lanes at UCSB, originally uploaded by jcgr.

Skateboard-dedicated lanes reduce the chance for accidents at UC Santa Barbara.

One can only guess at the mishaps that created the need for a skateboard lane.

Imagine pedestrians, bicyclists, skateboarders, and rollerbladers all trying to share a single concrete path without some traffic separation.

Enough discomfort leads to change

You go through the day to day.

And everything moves along, pretty much the same.

Until, one day, the status quo is no longer fine.

It could be a colleague moving to a new job, one they really, really want.

It could be the pants that no longer fit (but wasn't that extra brownie "free"?).

It could be great friends getting married and moving far away.

It could be your sister starting a family.

It could be a friend beginning a long-planned advanced degree - as you continue to stay in a job you feel is “just okay.”

It could be realizing that the price you pay for the life you thought was fine suddenly seems too high.

Whatever it is, discomfort with the status quo begins to build.

That's when change seems the easier play.

It’s not much fun…that growing discomfort…but it ultimately leads to a very productive day.

That’s when the balance tips. 

And positive change - leading more directly to the life you really want now - gets fully and finally underway.

Road trip on a full moon night

Road trip on a full moon night, originally uploaded by jcgr.

Memories are made of moments.

Special moments, and everyday moments, as well.

What's special about a memory-making moment?

It's fully-noticed and full-experienced before it has flown away.

Here a full moon lights the end of day, the beginning of night.

It was a beautiful, fleeting moment on the first stage of a quick southern California road trip to check out possible colleges for our son.

In reaching for the future don't miss the power of now

So you're trying to create a "perfect" whatever it is: business, product, relationship or some other future circumstance or state.

And that is good.

In the process, be mindful of the power of now.

You could be rushing past, so mesmerized by a future you envision that, in fact, you miss the power of what is:

The moment...

The information...

The trend...

The person, whether colleague, family member, friend, or someone you just met...

The opportunity...

...that's right in front of you, now.

Edible artistry

Amazing cakes, originally uploaded by jcgr.

Creativity can be expressed in many ways.

In this case, it's cakes.

Red velvet, as a matter of fact.

How do you express your creativity best?

Assumptions, assumptions...

Assumptions. They're risky to make.

They open up some paths of action, and close off many others.

If you choose to make assumptions, know what they are. Then check to see if you're right. You may very well be surprised.

Here's the advice others offer on the subject of assumptions and the problems they can lead to if they are not valid:

The least questioned assumptions are often the most questionable.
Paul Broca

Assumptions allow the best in life to pass you by.
John Sales

Assumptions are the termites of relationships.
Henry Winkler

We simply assume that the way we see things is the way they really are and the way they should be. And our attitudes and behaviors grow out of these assumptions.
Stephen Covey

In a start-up company, you basically throw out all assumptions every three weeks.
William Phelps

I have learned throughout my life as a composer chiefly through my mistakes and pursuits of false assumptions, not my exposure to founts of wisdom and knowledge.
Igor Stravinsky

The harder you fight to hold on to specific assumptions, the more likely there's gold in letting go of them.
John Seely Brown

And if you made assumptions that were wrong and are trying to work your way through the trouble that caused:

Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument.
Zachariah Tutu (Desmond Tutu's father)

Temper is what gets most of us in trouble. Pride is what keeps us there.
Unknown

Lushly layered and luminous reminder to relax

Lushly layered, originally uploaded by jcgr.

A gorgeous rose in full afternoon sunlight.

A reminder to stop.

Take a full, deep breath.

Catch the view.

Or remember a favorite one.

Relax.

And begin again...in a bit.

For now...take a full, deep breath.

And then again...

(And Happy Birthday, Mom. This one's for you).

The need for speed?

Our 17-year-old was in a talkative mood over lunch. He'd just returned from his volunteer job working with our pets' vet.

An impatient driver had just ZOOMED up behind him, then ZOOMED around him demonstratively, as Matt waited to make a left turn onto our street.

Our son is a good driver...I think. A parent never knows for sure once their kids pull away from the curb.

But from what I can see, and from what his driving record so far shows, I'd say so. He's not too fast, not too slow, attentive to what matters: getting where he needs to go, safely and sanely, not putting anyone else at risk in the process.

And so, Matt wondered what this particular pushy guy's problem, and need for speed was, exactly.

He imagined a conversation he'd have liked to have with Pushy Guy:

"Where are you GOING in such a hurry?!" Matt would ask.

"I don't know. But I have to go there FAST!" Pushy Guy would respond.

Matt had a few other choice thoughts about drivers with a compulsive need for speed, suggesting it as an attempt to mask insecurities of many types.

I laughed.

I'd had similar thoughts about drivers we experienced a week or so ago in hours on the road to, in and from LA.

My observation of Southern CA drivers (and lots on I5, too) was that many were hard-core tailgaters who thought nothing of putting themselves and many others at serious risk...for what, exactly?

In LA, there seemed to be a lot of erratic, last-minute-decider drivers.

As a rule, many were, "Whatever you do, don't give anyone clues about what you're going to do next!" drivers. Again, for what, exactly?

My dream drivers?

They create and maintain a flow. 

They may be right lane drivers, middle-of-the-road types, or drivers who live in the far left lanes of the road.

Wherever they thrive, road-wise, they create a safe and natural flow.

They're purposeful. They're driving-attentive.

Now, of course, if traffic is stopped or sludgy, there's not a lot you can do...until things start to move. In those circumstances, you can do your part by staying calm. No icy glares, aggressive tailgating, or gestures of profanity.

Will my model of the Dream Driver change Pushy Guy?

Not a chance, no.

He's too far down the road, pushing the next guy, then the next guy, and the next guy on his way to wherever he's in such a hurry to arrive.

What do you see: sale or save?

Sale or save?, originally uploaded by jcgr.

What word do you see in these clouds (if you see a word or two)?

Is it "sale"?

Is it "save"?

Or something else?

On a late afternoon walk a few weeks ago, I looked at the clouds as I always do. The ink blot shapes this time formed a word or two.

The difference - sale vs. save - amused me, almost as much as did the serendipitous arrangement of clouds forming letters and words, at all.

Random thoughts about nature, learning, curiosity and courage

"Just because" quotes here, found while researching a few articles and blog posts.

These thoughts may well provoke a few random and interesting thoughts of your own:

Few people know how to take a walk. The qualifications are endurance, plain clothes, old shoes, an eye for nature, good humor, vast curiosity, good speech, good silence and nothing too much.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit.
e.e. cummings

for whatever we lose (like a you or a me) / it's always ourselves we find in the sea.
e.e. cummings

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.
e.e. cummings

Facts are the air of scientists. Without them you can never fly.
Dr. Linus Pauling

My alma mater was books, a good library - I could spend the rest of my life reading, just satisfying my curiosity.
Malcolm X

The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
Ellen Parr